So I had a minor meltdown yesterday. I was talking to my mom and telling her I had made an appointment for a fill and she made the comment that she was wondering if I should, I told her my weight had stalled and I was able to eat more and not stay full as long.
She then asked how much weight I had lost(which I have told her numerous times) but I said around 30 lbs and she said "you have been doing this since February and that is all you have lost?
Do you really want to continue to do this?
You don't eat hardly anything as it is."
I was kind of stunned.
Yes I haven't lost much,
you are right I don't eat as much as I used to,
....but I think it is working it is just slow process.
You know what though---it is hard to argue with her because she is right.
In the past when I have lost weight or gone on diets I lose weight a lot quicker, BUT I always put it back on. I keep hoping that I won't put it back on but I am not positive that it won't happen. I am not eating as much as I used to so you would think the weight should be falling off, I don't know why it is not but it could be I am not exercising like a maniac like I used to when I diet?
I talked(texted) to MandaPanda yesterday and she reminded me that this is not gastric bypass it is not going to fly off, and by having that flipped port in the beginning it stalled my weight loss, shoot I even gained in April and it took May to take off the weight I had gained in April.
I guess it just hurts to hear out loud what I sometimes think in my head.
What was I suppose to do, throw my hands up in the air and say this is not working and go back to my yo yo dieting?
I am really trying to make this about a lifestyle change, something I can maintain and continue to do for a long period of time. For me that is getting some exercise EVERY DAY, doesn't have to break my back or sweat buckets but at least get me moving and try to keep moving all day, make healthier food choices but something that I enjoy eating. I don't want to eat foods I don't like, and exercise like crazy because I know I won't be able to sustain that for very long.
I did go to the gym last night and work out my frustrations, it felt great and I hope to do it again. As for my pity party, I am trying to bring out the positive but still riding the dumps today.