Exercise...yes I am doing it!
Do I love it...no not really. When I am up on the elliptical at times I feel empowered..othertimes..I WANT OFF.
Food is pretty darn good...the scale is not moving.ughh thinking there will be no loss this week and it is not due to not trying on the exercise and diet front....body obviously doesn't want to let go this week.
I. Will. Try. Not. To. Let. It. Derail me to a cookie binge!
I was looking at myself last night in the mirror after working out and sucking in my tummy..well the tummy went in but the skin hung like a kangaroo in my pouch..kind of funny. I may just snap a photo(as lapband gal did) and show you the humor. I am proud of the skin...because hey..I removed the fluff out of it. But it does not lend to a pretty swimsuit pin up.
Worst is my legs...they are my moms legs..they are not pretty. They are short and stalky and cottage cheesy and thick Not even shorts would make them look nice..and I am talking long shorts. Thank god for spanx and lycra.
This week I make the decision to stay at our Christian School(that is moving to the strip mall this summer) or branch to a new school. Yikes...seems like a big decision. Talking to the moms last night one mom said she is going to stick with it next year and make her decision next year. Another mom said she is too she did not want to be outside her community where she runs into everyone and knows everyone at the store and sports and such. That kind of struck a cord with me. Community. I moved to Anthem because I loved the community. It was like I lived in a small town even though we are a suburb of Phoenix. I run into people I know all the time at the grocery store and quite a few of them all know Johnny. In fact I am starting to be known as Johnny's mom more than who I am (I am ok with that too) Not sure what I will do. The new school looks really cool..its a huge campus about 30min away with all the features I love (PTA, after school sports, lots of extra curricular things to do, $100 less a month in tuition) but not close. We have a book author coming to visit our school next week which is pretty neat. She is signing books and giving them a workshop on writing books and reading to them. I love this..great opportunity for the kids.
Work is busy. In fact I need to buckle down to day and scope out accounting general ledger processing so that I can code it. I hate accounting. I hate t-tables. I hate balancing. It takes me much concentration to not only understand it, but program it. That is my week this week...
Hubby and I had a really rough weekend, don't want to go into it but lets just say we are going to start seeing a marriage counselor. I have a lot of anger and I am having a hard time getting back to being a couple. I feel a little dead inside and I am not sure how to fix that. Hoping someone will be able to show me. I thought with time it would heal..but its not, I just keep piling stuff up on top of it, which further deadens it.